I woke this morning in total darkness with my head screaming why was I still alive. How your mind tells you what you are really thinking. It was unsettling. I hide under the wool fleece I sleep with wanting to escape into further darkness and warmth. The same wool fleece I buried Randy in. At one time in England, it was the law that bodies were to be buried in fleece. I now understand why. It is warm, soft to the skin, and protective.
Earlier I phoned the suicide prevention people. He spoke to me for a short period of time and he said he would call me back. I half suspected that I had made a mistake in calling him as I waited for the police or someone to come and take me away. I finally fell asleep.
So much for non-profits who are suppose to help. All of them seem only to have very expensive designed web pages and only offer referrals, or nothing at all. It is a lie just like it says that you can get a lawyer when you need one. The worse one is the Elder group: SAIL. After you have your initial contact they filter further calls so there is no help.
To solve problems which you might not have even created, you commit suicide. Or if you are not too intelligent, you just wander the streets not understanding what happened.
drafted morning of June 21 2018 but not posted.
Wednesday, June 27, 2018
Thursday, June 14, 2018
Litigation is not a tea party; neither is it a forum to psychologically torture a self-litigant or a junior lawyer.
This morning 15 June 2018 I received an email from the Public Guardian and Trustee. I was told that the PGT had the same right as that of a poor man in that they can both sleep under the same bridge.
But that is not true as the PGT has more rights as it also has quasi-judicial powers which we the people unknown to us gave it. Rights that supersede the rich man and the poor man. The PGT is not regulated by due process, the bedrock of a just society.
We do not live in a democracy, we live in a silent dictatorship (Rocco Galati), and we do not even know it.
Saturday, June 9, 2018
The causality of being a self-litigant: how many suicides are not reported.
Family blames justice system for pushing man to suicide
Darrin White's brother-in-law cites court-ordered support payments that far exceeded his income.
Jeff Lee, Vancouver SunThe family of a Prince George man who committed suicide is blaming the judicial system for his death.Family members say Darrin White hanged himself because he couldn't stand the pressures placed on him by what they characterize as an unsympathetic court that systematically stripped him of his family responsibilities and saddled him with unbearable costs.
Lloyd McKenzie, a former B.C. Supreme Court judge
DARRIN WHITE: Took his own life after a court battle.
"The court system didn't listen to him. It failed him. He gave up, and no one wins. Not the kids, who now don't have a father, not the ex-wife, not the court," White's brother-in-law Murray Empey said Wednesday. "The court system bullied him to his death."
On March 1, B.C. Supreme Court Master Doug Baker ruled that White, who was on temporary stress leave from his job as a BC Rail locomotive engineer, was capable of paying $2,071 in spousal and child support for his ex-wife and three children, even though White was on disability at the time and was only getting $950 per month.
In addition, Baker disregarded another $439 per month White said he was paying to support a 14-year-old daughter from a previous union.
The amounts would have eaten up almost all of White's after-tax income even had he been working and not on disability, Empey said.
"It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see that the numbers didn't add up. But that didn't seem to matter to the judge. How is it that he could make an order like that when the money wasn't there in the first place?"
But it was more than just the money that drove White over the edge, Empey said in an interview shortly before he and White's father Les returned to Brandon, Man., to bury White.
White was so traumatized by the court system that he no longer felt he had any rights, even though he loved his children and wanted to be a part of their lives, Empey said.
"I think Darrin was in a state of mind where he was beat up by the courts and he just gave up," he said. "We talked to Darrin every day, sometimes twice a day, from Brandon, and no one ever thought he would do this. What really forced him was the fact he was fighting for visitation rights, fighting for any kind of rights, and trying to be a good father, and not being allowed to be that."
White's bitter court battles were marked by charges of spousal assault, restraining orders against both him and his ex-wife, and a restriction on his visitation rights.
In a court document in which White sought a variance on a restraining order, he wrote about the importance he placed on his role as a father.
"My children need their dad and I need them," he wrote.
"I cannot tell my children I love them even though I am sure they know it. They need to hear this as often as possible," he wrote in the document, dated last month.
In his reasons, Baker acknowledged White was under stress, in part because he was involved in several court actions involving his ex-wife. One of those involved an allegation of spousal abuse. But he said he didn't believe White was supporting his first child, and felt the man could go back to his job as a locomotive engineer within weeks.
Lloyd McKenzie, a former B.C. Supreme Court judge who speaks on behalf of the court, said the White case is no different than any of the thousands that go through the courts. In this case, the outcome of a marital breakup, which at the best of times is emotional, was doubly tragic, he said.
"There is nothing unusual about this judgment," McKenzie said. "These disputes go on every day. But you don't have this kind of human antagonism or emotion in any other kind of case. This man was obviously under a very great deal of stress."
McKenzie said the judge applied standardized guidelines for spousal and child support.
He said Baker would not give interviews to the media. "A judge talks to the world through his reasons of judgment. Master Baker doesn't have any personal interest, and he didn't have anything against the man."
White's death last week has become a rallying point for family-rights groups who say the 34-year-old couldn't withstand the stress of a family court system that "chews people up."
The Prince George Parent Child Advocacy Coalition is asking for a public inquiry into Baker's ruling and says White is only one example of a family maintenance support system gone awry. On Wednesday they held a protest outside the courthouse in Prince George.
"This is a hell of a problem across the country," said Todd Eckert, an advocate with PGPCA who represented White in court before Baker. "There were a number of contributing factors to this, but in the end, it came down to Darrin believing the system had failed him. And it did."
Eckert said White is an example of why federal Justice Minister Anne McLellan needs to rewrite family support laws to reflect a growing demand for joint parenting. He said the minister is sitting on a report that advocates rewriting legislation adopted three years ago that selectively favours custodial spouses.
White's 11-year marriage dissolved in January. His ex-wife, Madeleine, who is also trained as a locomotive engineer, was awarded custody of three children aged 10, 9 and 5, and was given the matrimonial house. White had restricted visitation rights. He had been accused of spousal assault, a charge Empey said his brother-in-law denied.
On March 12, family members called the police hours after he failed to show up for a scheduled visit with the children. Police later found a personal note to his father and children, and on March 17, discovered his body behind the home of a friend he had been staying with.
Darren Lindsay, Madeleine White's lawyer, said his client was in "very poor shape" over her ex-husband's suicide. He said there was no indication White was suicidal. The children have been told of their father's death.
Eckert said he understood White was extremely distressed because he was separated from his children.
Lindsay said his client was on welfare when she applied to the court for support. She and the children had left the matrimonial home and didn't have any money, he said.
Prince George coroner Suzanne Hare said she will be conducting an inquiry into White's death. A request for a full inquest has been received from the public but won't be ruled on until after the inquiry is complete, she said.
email 12 February 2014
Email: from 12 February 2014
Disrespectful Behavior : The visitors were wanting to let Randy hear my voice on their cell phones. I wanted him to know that I had not abandoned him. They was no covert criminal behavior.
VCHA had no intention of lifting the restrictions. I was threatened since 2010 that VCHA could make sure that I never see Randy ever again, not even on his death bed. From November 2013 to the date of the email they were in conversations with the Public Guardian and Trustee and Others to make Randy a non-person and REVOKE my power of attorney and representation agreement so I would never be able to see Randy again. From being good for Randy, I had to be bad for him. The PGT would then be able to place a DNR/DNT/CCO Order on Randy if VCHA deemed it was in Randy's best interest to hasten his death. All they had to do was get rid of me. I pleaded with a judge that I see Randy and she refused. I pleaded with everyone. Randy was going to be dead within 90 days and everyone knew it.
What a Blatant LIE the following email is: How can you trust those that are suppose to protect us.
Hi Audrey,
I think that it is important that I again reinforce the expectation that we laid out in our letter that was hand delivered and signed by you on Wednesday January 29th, 2014 outlining the 90 day restrictions we were imposing based on your ongoing behavior. This letter clearly described our expectation that if your behavior was respectful during this 90 day period that we would review the restriction and restart your visitations. Just so you are aware, VCH has a policy on the video or audio taping of staff without their consent. This is felt to be disrespectful behavior. We are aware that a couple of your friends have attempted to audiotape conversations with GPC staff without their consent. We are also aware that you had a female friend videotape your visit on Saturday February 8th without the involved staff's consent. These constitute disrespectful behavior.
You should also be aware that your disregard for the VCH wide restriction on January 29th and January 30th as well as your presentation at the PCQO office in VGH on January 31st have been noted. Going forward Audrey, I am responsible for all PCQO activities for Vancouver community so if you have any questions please direct them to me.
The bottom line Audrey is that we are willing to forgive your initial responses and activities from January 29th to February 10th and work towards removing this restriction after 90 days. However, should there be one more instance of audio/video taping of VCH staff without their consent or the unauthorized accessing of VCH property continue this restriction will not be lifted. The covert activities that you continually organize need to stop. We have clearly presented you with our expectations of respectful behavior and hope that you can follow these rules and have the restrictions lifted.
Director, Client Relations and Risk Management
Patient Care Quality Office
Phone: 604-730-7654
cc david.eby.mla@leg.bc.ca
604-466-1297
AG.minister@gov.bc.ca
1-250-387-1866
Subject:
Re: PCQRB Response - 3109
From:
Audrey Laferriere
Date:
2014-02-12 5:22 PM
To:
"Patient Care Quality Review Board HLTH:EX"
Do you not listen to what I am saying. I have complained for years to the Vancouver PQO and they have stood their ground and offered me nothing but sorrow. I ask that you fast track this process so I can visit my husband before he dies. Ask your superior this is very serious and could have negative impact on your organization in that it takes forever for something as important as life and death to go through the same process as someone complaining about the linen.
On Wed, Feb 12, 2014 at 3:08 PM, Patient Care Quality Review Board HLTH:EX
Dear Ms. Laferriere,
If you have not already done so, please contact the PCQO for Vancouver Coastal Health Authority by telephone at 1-877-993-9199 or email pcqo@vch.ca to register your complaint.
The PCQO has 40 business days to investigate your complaint and provide you with a response. During this time if you have any questions or would like an update on the progress of your complaint I suggest that you contact the PCQO. If you do not receive a response or your complaint has not been resolved by the above time limit, you may request a review by the Patient Care Quality Review Board.
Sincerely,
Brenda Evans
Intake Officer
Patient Care Quality Review Boards
Phone: 1-866-952-2448 Fax: 250-952-2428
Friday, June 8, 2018
email 2017-09-11...
email from 2017-09-11...
I do not expect your client to apologize. This whole mess was created by VCHA. Wanting an apology goes back to 2011. I thought I had an implied invitation to visit a resident at GPC. I went into his room to give him a plush toy and a male LPN took the plush out of my hand and threw it on the floor and said that the resident did not need it. Tell me, what would you do in that situation...the plush toy ended up in the nurses station. I have a picture of it in there. If the patient did not want it, the plush toy should have been returned to me. (addition June 2018 :I argued with the LPN and said he had no right to throw the plush toy on the floor and he had no right to make decisions for the resident. Security was called)
I get banned in 2011 for giving a resident a plush toy; and then I get banned 24/7 on 29 January 2014 after saving my husband's life. The incident of October 21 2013 was caused by VCHA. I was trying to take Randy home and staff attacked me. I had the right to take Randy off site as I had a representation agreement and Randy wanted to go. They assaulted me and imprisoned Randy against his will. It was I who insisted that the police be called.
The Petition to get a restraining order on April 8 2014 was hearsay and double hearsay. I had a lawyer at that time for a few days who reviewed the Petition. But then there are times hearsay is allowed. So I assume the application for the restraining order was drafted properly even though the hearsay was not true or not true enough to be believed . The purpose of the restraining order was to get the police to do VCHA's dirty work. Randy was in acute/intensive care on April 8 2014 dying and VCHA is in court asking for a restraining order that I never see Randy ever again.
It was not Randy who asked for a DNR/DNT on November 15, 2013, it was Dr. XXX who decided in error that Randy was dying. VCHA decided that it did not want to treat Randy further.
I do not expect your client to apologize. This whole mess was created by VCHA. Wanting an apology goes back to 2011. I thought I had an implied invitation to visit a resident at GPC. I went into his room to give him a plush toy and a male LPN took the plush out of my hand and threw it on the floor and said that the resident did not need it. Tell me, what would you do in that situation...the plush toy ended up in the nurses station. I have a picture of it in there. If the patient did not want it, the plush toy should have been returned to me. (addition June 2018 :I argued with the LPN and said he had no right to throw the plush toy on the floor and he had no right to make decisions for the resident. Security was called)
I get banned in 2011 for giving a resident a plush toy; and then I get banned 24/7 on 29 January 2014 after saving my husband's life. The incident of October 21 2013 was caused by VCHA. I was trying to take Randy home and staff attacked me. I had the right to take Randy off site as I had a representation agreement and Randy wanted to go. They assaulted me and imprisoned Randy against his will. It was I who insisted that the police be called.
The Petition to get a restraining order on April 8 2014 was hearsay and double hearsay. I had a lawyer at that time for a few days who reviewed the Petition. But then there are times hearsay is allowed. So I assume the application for the restraining order was drafted properly even though the hearsay was not true or not true enough to be believed . The purpose of the restraining order was to get the police to do VCHA's dirty work. Randy was in acute/intensive care on April 8 2014 dying and VCHA is in court asking for a restraining order that I never see Randy ever again.
It was not Randy who asked for a DNR/DNT on November 15, 2013, it was Dr. XXX who decided in error that Randy was dying. VCHA decided that it did not want to treat Randy further.
Email to GPC 25 October 2011
This is the contents of an email sent to GPC. It reminds how Randy wanted to learn and his learning tool went missing. And to think that VCHA/PGT said that I was not good for Randy.
On Tuesday October 25 2011 when I was returning Randy to your staff at 4:30 he wanted to take the chalk board and chalk and the letterboard with him so I let him. I thought that was a good sign. He might want to practise. On Wednesday and Thursday when I went to see Randy I asked the staff to return to his bedside and retrieve the chalk board, chalk, and letterboard. The letterboard was in a 1/4" binder decorated with a white and black pattern. Both times the staff returned and said they could not find the items. Yesterday being Thursday I also asked Sam and he went to Randy's bedside and returned and said that he cold not find the items but mentioned that he noticed the abundance of educational items I left with Randy over ten months ago. You might want to search for the chalk board, chalk and binder with the letterboard yourself. If you can't find the items or they are squirreled away in disarray it might mean a latent hatred for whatever issue one of your staff might have for his/her job. One time before my constructive banning, I found Randy's stuff in total chaos and it concerned me. I mentioned it to someone but I can't remember who it was.
On Tuesday October 25 2011 when I was returning Randy to your staff at 4:30 he wanted to take the chalk board and chalk and the letterboard with him so I let him. I thought that was a good sign. He might want to practise. On Wednesday and Thursday when I went to see Randy I asked the staff to return to his bedside and retrieve the chalk board, chalk, and letterboard. The letterboard was in a 1/4" binder decorated with a white and black pattern. Both times the staff returned and said they could not find the items. Yesterday being Thursday I also asked Sam and he went to Randy's bedside and returned and said that he cold not find the items but mentioned that he noticed the abundance of educational items I left with Randy over ten months ago. You might want to search for the chalk board, chalk and binder with the letterboard yourself. If you can't find the items or they are squirreled away in disarray it might mean a latent hatred for whatever issue one of your staff might have for his/her job. One time before my constructive banning, I found Randy's stuff in total chaos and it concerned me. I mentioned it to someone but I can't remember who it was.
Wednesday, June 6, 2018
email 28 October 2011
October 28 2011 ... being an email
They did it to me again. I went to see Randy at 2:00 p.m. and was told by XXX that Randy did not want to get up. And when I went to see Randy for my allotted five minutes (I am not allowed to stay in the Ward for more than five minutes under supervision) during which time Randy always changes his mind and wants to visit me when he sees me. Now the charge nurse XXX said that she doesn't have staff to put Randy in his chair so I could not see him in the piano room. She pulled this on Monday with me as well. This time I said if there is no staff to put Randy in his chair then I should be allowed to stay at his bedside. I was told that was impossible. Randy wanted me to stay. I also got a bit upset when I noticed Randy's head (he is primarily bald) had a whole much of scratches breaking his skin. When I told him I had to leave he won't let go of my hand. I can't stop crying. .... I can't help with his rehab if I can only see him a few minutes a week.
They did it to me again. I went to see Randy at 2:00 p.m. and was told by XXX that Randy did not want to get up. And when I went to see Randy for my allotted five minutes (I am not allowed to stay in the Ward for more than five minutes under supervision) during which time Randy always changes his mind and wants to visit me when he sees me. Now the charge nurse XXX said that she doesn't have staff to put Randy in his chair so I could not see him in the piano room. She pulled this on Monday with me as well. This time I said if there is no staff to put Randy in his chair then I should be allowed to stay at his bedside. I was told that was impossible. Randy wanted me to stay. I also got a bit upset when I noticed Randy's head (he is primarily bald) had a whole much of scratches breaking his skin. When I told him I had to leave he won't let go of my hand. I can't stop crying. .... I can't help with his rehab if I can only see him a few minutes a week.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)