24 April 2014

It has been 12 days since Randy died in the ICU at VGH.  I am so grateful that he died at VGH in its intensive care unit.  He had the best pallative care possible.  They kept him on life support until the support could not sustain him any more. His blood pressure was not compatible to life. I was able to hold his hand at the point that he died.  It was so sudden.  The nurse Susan was watching the monitor and she told me to hold his hand as he was going.  I am grateful to her as it only takes a second for a person to pass and he could have died without me knowing.. I do not remember crying at that moment.  Just holding his hand.

Randy has not been buried yet as I could not deal with him being incinerated.  He mentioned that he wanted a green burial in a forest.  I want to wrap him up in 100% wool which was what was the law in England at one time.  Everyone had to be buried in wool.  And I wanted him to be buried with his Steeler's hats and his Steeler's t-shirts.  I decided to keep his Steeler's jacket for myself as a tribute to his memory.

I am not well and I can't leave the one-room suite I live in.  I do not know how long I will be self- imprisoned here.

Randy's doggies are with me but they are so quiet all they do is lay on the floor and watch me.  Sometimes the little one, Owen, will come to me and lick/kiss my face and then I hold him tight and then I cry..

Otherwise my room is silent except for the district hum of traffic from Cambie Street. 

I just received three sympathy cards to date; but, then, more may come.  I want them for my memory box.
5976 Cambie Street Vancouver BC V5Z 3A9